(Un)Happy

Everyone I know has a preconceived image of me.

They see a girl who is always smiling, who is always laughing, who always has time to talk who is always unhappy.

They see this girl who is not me.

I am not the happy go lucky girl that everyone thinks I am.

Just because I am good at pretending, it doesn’t mean that I am like that all the time. And the worst part is that people think that there is nothing bothering me just because I keep that smile on my face.

I smile to keep everyone happy, and that in no way means that I am.

All people have to do is ask me how I am, but they don’t because they’d rather believe that I am happy than accept that I couldn’t be.

I don’t understand how people can expect any one person to be able to be happy or positive for a long time. Because I certainly cannot be.

So please stop projecting your expectations on to me. Please stop making me feel like I am not allowed to feel upset.

And please stop expecting me to be happy all the time.